Breastfeeding Woes - The Twiddler Baby

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Was having a little debate in my head on what topic to write for my blog. I have been writing a blog since maybe 10 years ago or so but it has always been private, so i could write whatever....
we were all young and stupid once

Since i am planning to make this stay public, i guess i have to think about what is in it for you guys too, right?

So a few nights ago, i lost it with M for the first time.
well maybe a couple more times than i care to admit I flicked him like quite hard. We were both half asleep and i have been feeding him for almost 2 hours already! My back is hurting and he cant stop pinching my other nipple. Such a twiddler this one. It annoys the crap out of me! Everytime! 

So yeah. Kena jentik la apa lagi. 

He was shocked that i did that, and started crying and i tried to pacify him. He sobbed to sleep.
and i sobbed too right next to him
I lay awake and couldnt help but feeling a little bad of what i did. Am i selfish? Should i be more patient?
i am no saint How am i supposed to teach him the right from
wrong, how am i supposed to parent since there's so many opposing way to do it, too many confusing school of thoughts. I read them all.
i get more confuse than ever  
So here's a few tips i've tried to make him stop grabbing my other boob while  feeding: 

1) give him toys - it backfires because he dropped those on my face, and his.

2) wear bra to sleep - well this works, but aint nobody like to wear bra to sleep! 

3) teach him how to play with my hair, face, fingers instead - nope, he goes straight to boobs. 

4) give him micro-fibre towel - this is my mom's idea actually, haven't tried it, but will let u know how it goes. 

Do u dislike it when your little one's little finger pinched and twiddled too? If yes what did u do? Share with with me your story.



My handsome son at 1 year old.





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